How many more?

Cloud 66 (1)

How many more days
Will you bound me in chains
In the castle where
I can’t even feel the rains?

How many more time
Will you beat me mother? 
Your words hurt like hell
Like they have broken me in pieces?

How many more time
Will you curse me mother? 
“I thought I was your child
But you have proved me wrong”

“I don’t want answers from you
Because I know, you have made my tears flow
So God will take care of you
You are no longer eligible to play with emotions”

I try my best to do
What you want
What can I do
If some of them I can’t?

I’m a human
Just like you
Or I’m only
If you think? 

Tell me
Do you love to see me cry? 
Oh, I forgot, I don’t cry
In front of you

“For I know
Boys are not supposed to cry
For they are strong
Even when they are getting drowned”

“I thought I was big enough
But you have told me otherwise
I thought I could paint my sky
You have taken my brush aside”

“What do you want?
I’m finished mother
I cannot give anything more
I simple cannot”

“You have spoken a lot today
I have been silent
Don’t you worry
I’ll make sure that I become silenced” 

“I will go away
You know
Not anywhere
But six feet below”

“To another mother of mine
In hope that she will take care of me
Better than you
For you have failed miserably” 

“Yes, I’m abnormal
I’m insane
I’m do not deserve
Your amazing grace”

“Yes, I’m a disgrace
To your holy womb
I’m a disgrace to
Human beings too”

“I know that ma, 
How many times
Will you remind me
How many more?”

“Let my days be numbered
Let all of thee
Who suffer like me
Be free”

“For you all are no good than
Those terrorists
Who have killed many men in Paris
For it is fear only what you can give”

How many more
Do I have to bear
My cross, oh Lord
Don’t you see, my body is tearing apart?

How many more
Times do I have to dry my tear glands
For there is none left
For my emotions?

How many more
Times, do I have say goodbye
To a smile
That occurred to me after a long time?

Can you please answer
How many more
How many more?


3 thoughts on “How many more?

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